Bill Simmons Exerpts

"If you're dressing your infant daughter like a Lions cheerleader this winter, you're basically announcing, 'I want my little girl to grow up with no self-esteem whatsoever and eventually go into porn.'"
- NFL Gifts that keep on giving

"Relive the Shaun Alexander era with an autographed Seahawks jersey … on sale for just $481!!!!! Should I make the "he signed this thing, walked three yards and fell down" joke? Nahhhhhhh."
- NFL Gifts that keep on giving